The Ribald Report

this is why we can't have nice things

on medicaid

during the third year of pharmacy school, the class was in a riot! the topic: the unfairness of the american welfare system. people were passionately arguing and shouting, some were literally crying. ironically, they were all arguing the same thing: welfare is ludicrously unfair. then, one young man raised his hand and held it there until the professor managed to shush everyone (which took a while). he solemnly stated something to the effect of, “this shouldn’t be a question of fairness. we live in a nation that is wealthy enough to ensure no one goes sick or hungry. isn’t it our moral duty?”

for the ignorant, medicaid is a joint federal and state funded program to cover the medical needs of certain populations. these people are children and their guardians and the terminally disabled (AIDS). even those in support of it couldn’t argue that it is a fair program but, in theory, it is the morally correct thing to do.

if you ask any pharmacy personnel to describe the typical medicaid patient, they could lecture you for an hour. it may be a generalization, but the typical medicaid patient is rude, ungrateful, impatient and ignorant. i’ve only met a few nice medicaid patients, and i believe the reason is because good medicaid patients don’t stay on medicaid for long.

so while i can’t say i like medicaid, i do support it. i do have a couple ideas for decreasing costs, however:

  • narcotics abuse. it genuinely warms my heart to know that a sick child will get better, in part due to my money. but my heart turns sour in an instant when a druggie walks away with a month’s supply of lortab for fifty cents. narcotics should only be covered for minors; benzodiazepines should only be covered for seizure patients. (a side note is that these medications are shit cheap. you can buy a month’s supply of either for less than $15)
  • luxury penalties. nothing pisses me off more than a medicaid patient pulling out a smartphone at the counter. cable television, expensive cars, and any other show of wealth should be accompanied with a penalty to benefits.
  • ADHD medication overuse. i hardly believe in the diagnosis of ADHD. i also believe that if you put anyone on amphetamines, they will perform better. finally, i don’t believe in giving children mind altering drugs with possible developmental effects.

are these rules fair? no! but neither is the system. that was a long post! but it’s hard to be concise when it comes to topics this big.